Experiences with Mother Meera:
She is a self professed AVATAR! This is the highest manifestation of the Paramatma/Divine on Earth. We are not dealing with any normal Guru here, or even an Avadhut. We are asked to express our acceptance of the Avatar. The Drop or manifestation of the Ocean. Nay, The Ocean itself is entirely in the drop and is manifested in Mother Meera.
Like Ananda Maayi Maa she also claims she has no previous karma to exhaust but is complete manifestation of Divinity. Others that fall in these categories are Sai Baba of Shirdi. Mere Mortals are Aurobindo, Shri Ramakrishna, Ramana Maharishi and others; who in alternative literature or hagiographies allude to their previous incarnations or at the least “memories”.
Unlike other Gurus/Saints she gives no talks at all and performs a ritual (darshan) recognized by some tantrics clearly as a reading. That would make her psychic at most, but no one that I know who has made her contact can truly vouch for a direct and definitive psychic experience.
Perhaps we are the unlucky or undeserving one, but those that claim to have her blessing, in my opinion have confused adulation, devotion and emotion, wrapped it into one word “wow”.
I have taken her “darshan” on more than one occasion, and I will admit that there is an air of religiosity about the whole genuflection.
Honestly, it is difficult to assess or criticize anyone if the person does not speak. But in the context of my own spiritual search, I wondered if Mother Meera has (or can) say anything at all?
I know what I am looking for. But if we don’t get knowledge, (satsangh) or something that all of us need or looking for: i.e. assistance in the choices we make or help in life crushing situations.
Mother Meera does say in her “answers” that it is It not possible to access the divine or partake in spiritual life unless the itch we have gets scratched first;, or we can taste the fruit of our labors, or fulfill our desires. The pain we have is too distracting and is just not conducive for spiritual practice.
But that is a blinding flash of the obvious and other have said this as well.
Most who have taken her Darshan, have eulogized her as Divine, but for persons like me who have not had any “experiences” or “blessing”, I am often accused that perhaps something is wrong with me.
I lack “faith: Of course I say.
In Western Demagogic Christian Meetings identical “experiences” and blind adulation occur. Of course without the loud music and hysteria.
The phenomenon is nothing but a tidal wave of hormones and devotion, nothing to do with the persons Divinity or lack of it.
As is the story of my life, I have had no out-of-this-world experiences at all.
So I began to question what the point of all of this was.
No enlightening or encouraging talks and I came out just as I went in. Bewildered, Confused, Angry, Hurt and betrayed. I was looking for some answers. Perhaps Divine intervention in untangling my life.
After all this was the divine herself. After reading many anecdotes how devotees have been helped, it gave me encouragement to seek her darshan and I EVEN WROTE IN SEVERAL TIMES. No such grace or luck was bestowed on me. Why?
What provokes the Devine to help some and not others? What instigates a guru to reach out and assists devotees in distress and times of crisis, and not others? Was I interacting with an Avatar in Mother Meera. Honestly, I don’t know.
The ultimate experience is of Gurus choosing just someone at random and bestowing Shaktipath. (Shaktipath is like winning the spiritual lottery, because the Guru lifts the disciples’ consciousness to higher realms).
Was there a Guru or Savior that I could meet and relate to and vice versa?
I noticed another oddity. Very few Indians attended her Darshans. And when they did, I noticed it was the upper class Indians. In a room of 100 who came for here darshan, perhaps 1 or 2, if at all.
I asked some of her Western Devotees, how she raises money and most of them were evasive in their replies. I think it probably was all donations from the West. No problem: That is great!!!! Because with her school in Madanapalle it is certainly well spent.
I think any area that the Government of India does not provide services, opens up an opportunity for intervention. Instant Sanctimony through charity!!! And there are plenty of opportunities for that in India. Start with filling up the potholes. Become a Saint of Road!
I also spent some time with a very close relative of hers. A blood relative who has known her all his life.
And he was completely underwhelmed to. This is what he told me:
Mother Meera converses about 5-6 times on the phone with AdiLaxmi her “channeller” regarding letters she receives from supplicants from the West. Indians she ignores. Interesting.
And all Indians I encountered noticed this as well. The biggest bang for buck comes from the West, not the Indians so it makes perfect business sense to spend her “psychic” powers (if at all) where it is most appreciated.
So she is an Avatar for the West only. OK at least she is an Avatar for White People.
One paragraph caught my eye in the small book “Answers”.
In that book Mother Meera says she feels hurt when her work is criticized or her activities are questioned. I don’t remember the exact words, but look for it. For an Avatar, I found it rather petty even human. Even Gurus lesser level than an Avatar are beyond the play of satisfying or expressing the ego.
I found that disappointing and underwhelming.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Preceptors and Gurus of Bihar School of Yoga
I stumbled upon Swami Saraswati books in the 1970s and was immediately touched by the depth and simplicity of his words. Importantly, his commentaries and answers were relief to the rigid dogma of my fundamentalist Christian upbringing. Since the age of 11, I fought all types of religious affiliation and after reading some of BSY books and J.K. I began a serious pursuit of Vedantin + Buddhist thought.
Undoubtedly, Swami Satyananda of BSY is one of the true living accomplished masters with the highest Vidyas. What impressed me early on was that the “connection” with the Guru was critical if one was to progress on any path.
Over the years, however I am not sure if I have achieved a connection, or am I deluding myself that a connection would be possible at all.
I was not overtly interested in “spiritual life”. I felt that my relationship with the world was one of engagement and conquest of life’s bad hand. I became a Banker and after 20 years of a career, life took a nasty turn. Matters went from bad to worse and soon after these events I noticed a strange phenomenon. Every time I visited or stayed at the Ashram or even glanced at the Guru, things went from bad to really worse. I began to question my relationship to my lineage, my “spiritual” mentors and Gurus.
Perhaps I misjudged what a Guru was or what was expected from a Guru. My impressions from reading and hearing what the role of the Guru was behooved me to lay my troubles on his lap. So I thought. But I was wrong. I am not questioning the actions or lack of actions of the Guru, I am questions life itself.
In the many years of my service and trust nothing happened. So I asked myself, what do his patently demonstrative powers have anything to do with my path or struggles? Nothing, I concluded.
My hope was based on hearsay and if I have not seen anything or experienced anything personally , my devotion of Him was based entirely on MYTH as well.
They may be some who have seen him cure people of deadly diseases, helped many in dire difficulty, seen him manifest at many places at the same time, and levitate. But what does it have to do with me, I asked? Nothing. Most of the Senior Swami’s I know are also fans of him because of this hearsay as well, but won’t admit it. Now that is obviously FAITH. Evidently, I lack it. And as a doubting Thomas how can someone like me connect with the Guru?
I can understand the premise that the seeker has to solve his problems. Despite trying valiantly or stumbling like a fool , there comes a stage that no seeker can focus on the Sadhana or practices till his problem is solved. Indeed we cannot be effective in life till our basic needs are addressed. It soon dawned on me after years of struggling that I was going nowhere either materially or Spiritually. I did not seek the Spiritual Life or Yoga; Yoga, crashed into me.
I am no Natchiketas!
I sit down to do my Sadhana, but every time I sat down for those 10-15 minutes of meditation, my problems would rush in. Those sit ins would last for an hour or sometimes days It was useless. Finally, I realized I could not proceed till my mundane life was successfully resolved and I could take care of myself or my family.
I heard sanctimonious advice and truism from fellow disciples.
One of common refrain was that this was all entirely the Guru’s play. This was not growth, this was talent being wasted or death at a glacial pace. (In these days of accelerated Global Warming this is poor metaphor)!
So what now? Nothing works despite years of struggle. My guru if I can call him that, is unapproachable.
I continue to seek a personal mentor who could put my life in perspective and most importantly protection. This now seems illusionary and impossible
.
I feel having viewed my lineage close up, only a handful of disciples enjoyed a personal relationship with him. I feel that these people had this benefit ONLY BECAUSE OF SOME KIND GENETIC CONNECTION WITH THE GURU. For the rest of us, we were like fans at a rock concert who adulated over a rock star. For him, we don’t even exist. I am asking the same irreverent question: Perhaps HE as helpless like us? If not, does he care?
Like Eklavya, for some strange reason we lack the pedigree to get access to a Guru to sort out our lives personally. Like Prometheus, the fire is denied to us, we have to steal it.
So some questions were raised in my mind. It started with the Sat Chandni MahaYagna (SCMY) that I attended a few times.
Of the thousands that attended it, truly whose desires or obstacles at the mundane
level were met or mitigated? 50%? 99%? What not 100% . Perhaps all of you that attended it had your needs fulfilled . But not me.
Did it require blind faith? I don't know what Faith is!
How does one who does not understand the rituals or chants relate to the events? How does one who sees failure day in and day out then have his expectations lowered further even after attending this?
Take a deep breath and give an honest answer to your self. Did the SCMY really help? It did? Good.
I feel Yoga has its limits for people in crisis. Turning to Yoga in time of crisis is akin to digging for water to put out the flames of your burning house. How do we put out the flames of the burning house? Are there Gurus for that? Is Sai Baba of Putaparthy like this?
Imagine Parents who lose all their children in one swoop and are in grief?
Imagine a father who loses house, hearth and all his savings and brings his family to near penury.
Imagine a father losing his eyesight slowly to disease and stress and cannot get back on the saddle because he is told that he is overqualified and then fails a corporate medical exam.
Imagine losing a limb in an accident.
Imagine a husband who has to hang his head in shame when he see is wife out to work having to do things no husband would wish his wife to go through to pay the bills.
How does Yoga help in these situations?
When I related this to a senior swamy in Rikhia, the response I got was: “excellent”. What do they know that I don’t? Or are they all deluded?
But then, these are gurus with millions of fawning devotees with FAITH.
But if one closely scrutinizes their lives honestly they are miserable like the like the rest of us. Like frogs that have been swimming in hot water for long time, they are blinded by the Sun’s curative powers and don’t know they are and dying. This in my opinion is true for all our Gurus and to be honest even the greatest gurus of all.
I concluded that there are different type of Gurus. From philosophers, to archaryas, to health, and then Yoga/Tantra. Each of them have a different equation to the world around them. With Yoga Gurus it is the propagation of Yoga. Perhaps there are others like Sathya Sai Baba of Shirdi with more compassionate mandate.
But are there any today?
For people like us who question, who have not suspended our disbelief, we are isolated and alone at multiple levels. This sense of “aloneness” I have had since 2 yrs old!!! We are beyond outcasts. What is our lot?
I am reminded of Shri Aurobindo words:
“He who would save the world must share its pain” ~ Savitri
And I must submit that Yogic Guru is terribly restricted to persons with normal lives, not for people who have experienced trauma or shock and don’t share their pain.
Some questions that I continue to ask are:
1. Is the Guru Disciple relationship a myth? Or is this only a one way street?
2. Are we as disciples truly and absolutely alone? Is the material blessing or even spiritual blessing a lottery?
3. Importantly, is the Guru alone as well?
4. Does success on the spiritual path have to be selfish?
As I begin to slip deeper into the abyss, I search for that someone who could help but I have not found that person. Just tall claims.
My next post will be on my experiences with Mother Meera a self proclaimed Avatar! Sai Baba of Puttparthi, Shree Maa and others.
Undoubtedly, Swami Satyananda of BSY is one of the true living accomplished masters with the highest Vidyas. What impressed me early on was that the “connection” with the Guru was critical if one was to progress on any path.
Over the years, however I am not sure if I have achieved a connection, or am I deluding myself that a connection would be possible at all.
I was not overtly interested in “spiritual life”. I felt that my relationship with the world was one of engagement and conquest of life’s bad hand. I became a Banker and after 20 years of a career, life took a nasty turn. Matters went from bad to worse and soon after these events I noticed a strange phenomenon. Every time I visited or stayed at the Ashram or even glanced at the Guru, things went from bad to really worse. I began to question my relationship to my lineage, my “spiritual” mentors and Gurus.
Perhaps I misjudged what a Guru was or what was expected from a Guru. My impressions from reading and hearing what the role of the Guru was behooved me to lay my troubles on his lap. So I thought. But I was wrong. I am not questioning the actions or lack of actions of the Guru, I am questions life itself.
In the many years of my service and trust nothing happened. So I asked myself, what do his patently demonstrative powers have anything to do with my path or struggles? Nothing, I concluded.
My hope was based on hearsay and if I have not seen anything or experienced anything personally , my devotion of Him was based entirely on MYTH as well.
They may be some who have seen him cure people of deadly diseases, helped many in dire difficulty, seen him manifest at many places at the same time, and levitate. But what does it have to do with me, I asked? Nothing. Most of the Senior Swami’s I know are also fans of him because of this hearsay as well, but won’t admit it. Now that is obviously FAITH. Evidently, I lack it. And as a doubting Thomas how can someone like me connect with the Guru?
I can understand the premise that the seeker has to solve his problems. Despite trying valiantly or stumbling like a fool , there comes a stage that no seeker can focus on the Sadhana or practices till his problem is solved. Indeed we cannot be effective in life till our basic needs are addressed. It soon dawned on me after years of struggling that I was going nowhere either materially or Spiritually. I did not seek the Spiritual Life or Yoga; Yoga, crashed into me.
I am no Natchiketas!
I sit down to do my Sadhana, but every time I sat down for those 10-15 minutes of meditation, my problems would rush in. Those sit ins would last for an hour or sometimes days It was useless. Finally, I realized I could not proceed till my mundane life was successfully resolved and I could take care of myself or my family.
I heard sanctimonious advice and truism from fellow disciples.
One of common refrain was that this was all entirely the Guru’s play. This was not growth, this was talent being wasted or death at a glacial pace. (In these days of accelerated Global Warming this is poor metaphor)!
So what now? Nothing works despite years of struggle. My guru if I can call him that, is unapproachable.
I continue to seek a personal mentor who could put my life in perspective and most importantly protection. This now seems illusionary and impossible
.
I feel having viewed my lineage close up, only a handful of disciples enjoyed a personal relationship with him. I feel that these people had this benefit ONLY BECAUSE OF SOME KIND GENETIC CONNECTION WITH THE GURU. For the rest of us, we were like fans at a rock concert who adulated over a rock star. For him, we don’t even exist. I am asking the same irreverent question: Perhaps HE as helpless like us? If not, does he care?
Like Eklavya, for some strange reason we lack the pedigree to get access to a Guru to sort out our lives personally. Like Prometheus, the fire is denied to us, we have to steal it.
So some questions were raised in my mind. It started with the Sat Chandni MahaYagna (SCMY) that I attended a few times.
Of the thousands that attended it, truly whose desires or obstacles at the mundane
level were met or mitigated? 50%? 99%? What not 100% . Perhaps all of you that attended it had your needs fulfilled . But not me.
Did it require blind faith? I don't know what Faith is!
How does one who does not understand the rituals or chants relate to the events? How does one who sees failure day in and day out then have his expectations lowered further even after attending this?
Take a deep breath and give an honest answer to your self. Did the SCMY really help? It did? Good.
I feel Yoga has its limits for people in crisis. Turning to Yoga in time of crisis is akin to digging for water to put out the flames of your burning house. How do we put out the flames of the burning house? Are there Gurus for that? Is Sai Baba of Putaparthy like this?
Imagine Parents who lose all their children in one swoop and are in grief?
Imagine a father who loses house, hearth and all his savings and brings his family to near penury.
Imagine a father losing his eyesight slowly to disease and stress and cannot get back on the saddle because he is told that he is overqualified and then fails a corporate medical exam.
Imagine losing a limb in an accident.
Imagine a husband who has to hang his head in shame when he see is wife out to work having to do things no husband would wish his wife to go through to pay the bills.
How does Yoga help in these situations?
When I related this to a senior swamy in Rikhia, the response I got was: “excellent”. What do they know that I don’t? Or are they all deluded?
But then, these are gurus with millions of fawning devotees with FAITH.
But if one closely scrutinizes their lives honestly they are miserable like the like the rest of us. Like frogs that have been swimming in hot water for long time, they are blinded by the Sun’s curative powers and don’t know they are and dying. This in my opinion is true for all our Gurus and to be honest even the greatest gurus of all.
I concluded that there are different type of Gurus. From philosophers, to archaryas, to health, and then Yoga/Tantra. Each of them have a different equation to the world around them. With Yoga Gurus it is the propagation of Yoga. Perhaps there are others like Sathya Sai Baba of Shirdi with more compassionate mandate.
But are there any today?
For people like us who question, who have not suspended our disbelief, we are isolated and alone at multiple levels. This sense of “aloneness” I have had since 2 yrs old!!! We are beyond outcasts. What is our lot?
I am reminded of Shri Aurobindo words:
“He who would save the world must share its pain” ~ Savitri
And I must submit that Yogic Guru is terribly restricted to persons with normal lives, not for people who have experienced trauma or shock and don’t share their pain.
Some questions that I continue to ask are:
1. Is the Guru Disciple relationship a myth? Or is this only a one way street?
2. Are we as disciples truly and absolutely alone? Is the material blessing or even spiritual blessing a lottery?
3. Importantly, is the Guru alone as well?
4. Does success on the spiritual path have to be selfish?
As I begin to slip deeper into the abyss, I search for that someone who could help but I have not found that person. Just tall claims.
My next post will be on my experiences with Mother Meera a self proclaimed Avatar! Sai Baba of Puttparthi, Shree Maa and others.
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